4thApril

Juno

I just watched Juno today whilst doing research for my paper.

There was one scene that really hit me. The whole concept of divorce, when she is confronted by it and says to her dad “I just need to know if it’s possible for two people to stay happy together forever”

Man that hit me… I could never imagine ever getting married and not being in it for the long haul, “til death do us part,” I just don’t know if I could ever leave someone, or let it get to that point. I don’t understand the concept of getting married and “falling out of love” — don’t people understand that euphoria isn’t meant to last forever? The whole point is that you are meant to get it right the first time. Man, that is scary.

I really look forward to dedicating the rest of my life making someone the happiest person in the world, one of the things that I eagerly await is raising wonderful children (not in any measurable way, they are “wonderful” just because they are and I will be privileged enough to love them).

But that is some serious responsibility there, I couldn’t imaging letting my kids have a broken family, it would honestly break my heart.

I also loved the quote from Juno’s step-mother when she saw the adopted mother with the baby in her hands for the first time: “you look like a new mother… scared shitless.”

All that being said, I am still plenty young with my life ahead of me, there is just so much responsibility. But my job isn’t actually to get it all right. My job is to do the best I can with what I have and to be honest and consistent with my character.

Still, knowing full well that I’m not going to rush things, it is still a pretty exciting, however scary, prospect — being with the person you love forever, growing together, living life and sharing in the experience of raising and loving children.

That’s my [rather full on] thoughts for today :P

3 Comments

stella says 5th April @ 13:49

Great movie, Juno. Good to see a story about a teenage pregnancy that does not follow the typical tragic script. And Luke, as a divorced woman I can tell you that most of us don’t get divorced because we expect the euphoria to last. And it’s not even necessarily falling out of love. I can honestly say I still love my first husband and we get on better not living with each other. It’s about causing each other an awful lot of pain and in the end it’s just not worth it. And you know, I don’t regret marrying my first husband even though it was really hard for a long time. Just because a marriage isn’t easy or doesn’t last forever, doesn’t mean it is a failure. I learned a lot in my first marriage and would not be who I am without it and I value that.

lukefreeman says 5th April @ 14:11

Stella! Thanks for the comment :)
Yeah, I know I was making particular reference to certain circumstances with such little understanding having never been there myself… which is just why it scares me so much. I commend you and your attitude and certainly agree that everything in life is a learning experience - I try to live on a no regrets, just experiences, kind of attitude myself. Your comment reminds me of my second last paragraph when I said “But my job isn’t actually to get it all right. My job is to do the best I can with what I have and to be honest and consistent with my character.”

So I guess that is the best I can do. I’m not going to pre-empt anything or make decisions because of fear - but I think it is mainly a reflection of how big life is and how aware I am that we are all ill equipped if we expect to do everything “right” or “ideal” and I don’t think we are called to.

Thanks again!! Great insight & feedback, thank you!

stella says 8th April @ 21:58

Yeah, I really agree that our job isn’t to get it right but to do the best we can. I think God really works a lot with our mistakes. In some ways the crucifixion was a dreadful mistake, a real tragedy, but look what God made of it. I think we have to be honest and vulnerable but I’m not so hung up on being consistent. If we are always consistent we wil not change and I really beleive life should always be transforming us so we become more like God. If we stick to consistency we won’t change. Maybe integrity is what you are getting at.
You know I think probably what I’m really trying to say to you is don’t be so scared about getting it wrong. You will get it wrong as we all do. But God can do a lot with our mistakes. Which is what you are saying about how we are all ill equipped. ANd we are especially ill equipped for marriage and family. Only marriage itself will make you ready for marriage. It’s about a willingness to ge on the journey and hold onto your integrity. There is no such thing as knowing this is “the right one”, only a willingness to give it your best and to learn. And that no matter what actually happenss, it’s what we do with what happens. ANd trusting that in the end all will be well.

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